Anorexia & How It Rules my Life, Part 2

This is Part 2 in a series that I’ve decided to publish about my struggles with Anorexia and how it affects me every single day.  You can find Part 1 HERE

8 1/2 years ago I moved back to my hometown.  I was newly single, had no friends around me, no job, and really wasn’t sure where my life was going.  I felt it all starting again and yet the “sick” part of me didn’t care. I was very depressed and just wanted to feel better.  I wanted to feel wanted again (by someone else).  The last several months of my relationship hadn’t been happy (even though they should have been since I was planning my wedding) and I had a lot of recovering to do not only from ending my relationship, but also the psychological damages that had been done the 6 months prior to that.  My way of dealing with it was to walk and eventually start running and not eating.  I was going to show the instaquote-08-02-2015-11-17-13world that I was ok by having an amazing body!  (Or at least that is the lie I was telling myself, which in fact I know now was giving the opposite message!)  Over the next year or two I dropped a lot of weight and got down to my smallest size ever (in my adult life).  I felt great on the outside, but not on the inside.

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Anorexia and How it Rules My Life, Part 1

I am taking a deep breath! I’ve shared my story about anorexia with vague details with people in my life, but never in detail and never described how it rules my life, even today.  I’m going to warn you that these will be a couple of deeper posts and will take me several to get my story out because it’s not something that can be contained into a brief concise post!  I’m not sharing my story to get sympathy or anything like that.  I’m sharing it because it is truly part of who I am and what has made me who I am.  I also think that anorexia is a topic that is shunned talking about, people tell anorexic’s it’s all in our head, which in fact it is an illness and one that you aren’t cured from..you just learn how to cope!  

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