Stepmom, yes. Victim, no!
I love the support that the stepmom community within social media provides, but I also get very frustrated with the mentality that stepmoms or step-dads are victims. Unfortunately there seems to be a group of step-moms specifically on Twitter (or at least that’s where I have found them) that have decided that step-moms are treated unfairly and that we are the victim in the situation. I’m a step-mom and I’m telling you we are not victims.
Choosing to date and marry someone with children from a previous relationship or marriage is a very conscious decision. It affects the dynamics of your relationship on so many levels. There isn’t a honeymoon period where it’s just you and your spouse and there’s actually 3 or 4 people in your relationship (directly or indirectly): you, your spouse, the other parent and possibly another step-parent). You have to be very aware of the situation that you are in and how every decision you make affects not only your household, but quite possibly the other household!