T-Shirts & Tears

I folded another “little” shirt the other night and put it on the stack of shirts to sell or giveaway! As I did a tear rolled down my cheek!  M has been growing at a rapid pace lately! Too fast for my liking!! Every weekend when I do laundry, I’m folding at least one shirt that has gotten too small or one pair of pants that look more like capris, or a pair of shorts that are on their way to looking like volleyball shorts…these go into a pile to either giveaway or sell (depending on how long they’ve been around and what kind of conditions they’ve been introduced to during their life in our home)!!

I have so many mixed flavors about the boys growing up!  First, it’s happening WAY too fast!  Granted, the boys and I first started spending time together about the time that M turned 6, so it’s only been about 5 years! I say only 5 years and yet in my next thought I think “it’s already been 5 years?”  How can I be so schitzophrenic about this??  These boys are growing at what seems like lthe speed of light  R has been 6ft. or taller for about 9 months now and still has a little over a month before he turns 15!  M has probably grown 4 inches since Christmas!  How does this happen?

The other emotion I feel about the boys growing up is pride!  I’m so proud of the young men that they are becoming!  They truly are becoming respectful, polite, smart young men! Its such a bittersweet feeling becasue I know what great men they are going to make and yet, it means they are growing and getting closer to being out on their own.  I mean R graduates in 4 years??  Did I pass out for a few years?!?

The first camping trip we took the boys on!  They were 6 & 10! It seems like yesterday!
The first camping trip we took the boys on! They were 6 & 10! It seems like yesterday!

As I stand in my bathroom and look at the tub of toys that hasn’t been played with in several weeks, my heart hurts.  It longs for the days when M is asking me to read books to him while he plays in the tub or him asking T for a piggy back ride.  I came in mid-childhood and I would love to to relive the last 5 years again!  But, I know that I can’t and know that the future is going to bring amazing experiences and futures for these boys.

I feel honored and blessed to be watching these boys grow up and to be helping in that process!  I just wish that time would slow down!  I never really grasped what my parents meant when they said that the time flies, but I guess experiencing that and understanding it is all part of Learning As I Go!

5 Replies to “T-Shirts & Tears”

    1. I agree! It seems to be a popular heartache right now! But, maybe because it’s spring they are all growing so much! Either way it’s happening all too fast! Hugs to you Momma!

  1. I can totally relate. As Micah turned 30 last week (and no—I was not born in 1940 like Jeni thought) I realized how I don’t have boys anymore –I have young men. It is what we all know will happen eventually but when it does it just feels like it is wrong somehow. I have my moments when I mourn those long ago days but then I realize that this is “my” time and all those responsibilities and hectic times of their younger days are gone and I can just enjoy the time with the hubby. When we are together, that is. 🙂

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