Tag: step-parent

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5 Tips for the First Years as a Step-Parent

— Katy Flint2 Comments
5 Tips for the First Years as a Step-Parent

There are articles in magazines and all over the internet for surviving your first trimester of a pregnancy, the first year of your babies life..there are books written about it.  But what about those of us who actually didn’t birth the children in our care?? Becoming a stepmom is the most wonderful, difficult, rewarding, and frustrating thing I’ve ever experienced in my life! I can’t imagine my life without my step-sons in it anymore, but wow were those first couple of years tough!!  Here are my top 5 tips for step-parents to help you survive the first years as a step-parent!

     5.  Stop Comparing Your Family to Other Blended Families – it’s easy to compare yourself to Bob & Mary down the street and how their blended family works, but it’s pointless!  Every blended family is different and that’s because every person is different, every divorce is different, and every marriage is different.  Realize this and be OK with it.  Be confident in the blended family you have and focus on it!  Don’t compare yours to someone else’s because you will always feel let down!

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R is 15!

— Katy Flint

I decided on M’s birthday back in March, that I would write a letter to each boy each year on their birthdays. You can read the letter to M here, but today is dedicated to R, who turns 15 today!!

Dear R,

You’re 15 today!  I’m still in denial about it and plan on staying there for the next several years!  It seems like the last 5 years have gone so fast!  (You were just 10 when we went camping together for the first time, do you remember that?)  I do, so very clearly!  You were so little!  Not so much anymore!  You’re my gentle giant now!  I don’t know if I’ve ever met a 15 year old boy (I know you’re not a boy anymore, but see the first sentence about denial) that is as gentle and quiet as you.  You’ve always been that way too (as long as I’ve known you anyway)!

Our relationship has been fantastic!  We’ve never really had any issues between you and I and it seems, in my opinion, that our relationship is a special one.  It’s not like the one you have with your mom (and that’s great) or even the one you have with dad…it’s just what’s perfect for you and me.  I cherish it, I hope you know that!  I cherish the times we spend together! I cherish the memories we have together and those times when we just get to talk and you tell me about whatever is going on in your life!  Those times hold the most meaning in my heart and always will! 

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M is 11!

— Katy Flint10 Comments

You’ll forgive me if #TastyTuesday takes a week off so I can recognize M’s 11th birthday right?  I appreciate it!  It’s amazing to me the longer that the boys and I are in each others lives how much I love them and how much more connected to them I become!

Dear M,

You’re 11 today!  I don’t know how it happened!  Do you know that you had just turned 6 when you and your deep brown eyes entered my life?  I could have sworn it was just yesterday!!  I wasn’t there when you were born, or when you took your first steps or said your first words, but you have had, for years now and will continue forever and always, a special place in my heart!  You are such an amazing little boy (and really, not so little anymore as you are on a quest to be bigger than me and you pride yourself in every inch closer that you get!)  I want to keep you little!  I want to keep folding your little clothes, although they keep getting bigger and bigger!  I’m not ready for you to grow up, but I know it’s going to happen no matter what! 

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One of Those Days

— Katy Flint2 Comments

Before I begin, I want to thank everyone who commented on any of my posts in December!  We were able to raise $26.00 for the Rossi House!  The exciting part is that this is almost double what I donated last month!  Thank you all for having great hearts!

I met my mom for a walk this other day. As I met her, I said, “Please tell me that you had days when I was little that you thought…it’s only 11AM, it’s not too late to start drinking!” Oh boy did she laugh at me! (And then she proceeded to tell me that she didn’t think of drinking, but of finding someone to pawn me off on!  Comforting and yet disturbing all at once!)

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The Highs & the Lows

— Katy Flint2 Comments

I know that I didn’t give birth to R & M and I would never claim them as my biological children. They have a mother, they have that person who gave birth to them and shares their blood. I don’t and I know that and I’m reminded of that daily. However, I do love those boys as though they were biologically mine and I do consider them mine as well! I do parent them; I wash their dirty underwear; I make them meals; put band-aids on; help with homework & projects; get stains out of shirts & jeans; make them clean their rooms; listen to them talk about their day; I buy items because I know they like a specific snack; I think about what foods they like & don’t like when I cook meals; I pick them up from school & practices; I buy them clothes and shoes,; I pay for registration for extra curricular events. In all senses of the word, I am a parent to those boys. Do I do it full-time? Nope! Do I get the lows & the highs of parenting? Absolutely!

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